Julie Lythcott-Haims delivers a phenomenal speech on parenting and the concept of over-parenting. I am a father of 3 girls (8, 3, 2) and this is something I think about ALL of the time. My 8 year old is going on 16 and she likes to push the limit at every turn.
Being 100% transparent about my 8 year old: she has stated that she does not want to go to college and, at this point, that does not bother me at all because I want her to be happy. As a former teacher, I have witnessed my kids go a variety of ways after school to find happiness so this does not intimidate me. What does is that I want to make sure that I am treating her like a wildflower and not a bonsai tree. I want her to grow up with a sense of self worth and efficacy, an understanding of love, and the ability to follow her dreams.
Do you raise your children or treat your students like bonsai trees or like wildflowers?
This TED talk is described below: (Link to site)
By loading kids with high expectations and micromanaging their lives at every turn, parents aren’t actually helping. At least, that’s how Julie Lythcott-Haims sees it. With passion and wry humor, the former Dean of Freshmen at Stanford makes the case for parents to stop defining their children’s success via grades and test scores. Instead, she says, they should focus on providing the oldest idea of all: unconditional love.